“My foster carers always showed me that I deserve love”: Megan's story
Meg didn't believe that she'd ever find her forever home until she met Sue and Derrick. Read on to learn about her incredible journey through care to independence
Megan lived with her foster carers, Sue and Derek for five years before being accepted on a course to study film at university. Now a graduate, and settled into her own home, Meg says Sue and Derek are still a huge part of her life.
Megan wants their tremendous support and care to be celebrated and shared. She reflects on her time with the couple and how they’ve helped support her over the years.
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“Living with Derek and Sue was life changing for me, I really feel they should be known for the positive impact they’ve had on my childhood.
“Before I moved in with them, I honestly didn't know the meaning of family. I thought I wasn't going to be able to have a family."
I was only meant to be with the family I was with before for two weeks and I ended up staying there for two years.
"I thought I was just going to be this person that moved from house to house because nobody wanted to take the time to get to know me. But Sue and Derek drove up to meet me and wanted me to move in shortly afterwards. I’d never experienced that.
“One day, someone told me I’m moving in to my forever home, and I was like, ‘yes, great!’
"I didn't expect too much of it. I just thought this will be just another place that’s not going be able to handle whatever’s going on with me.”
“I remember feeling very nervous, but we hit it off straight away. From then on, I can honestly say my life was amazing and I genuinely had a nice childhood. I regained my humanity because I wasn't just this number on a page anymore. I was Meg.
“The rest was history, really. I came down for breakfast the next day, and it was like I'd always lived there.
I regained my humanity because I wasn't just this number on a page anymore. I was Meg.
“A day living with Sue and Derek was just like normal family life, and that was the best thing about being there. Just being part of a family and feeling like my needs were being listened to.
“Sue and Derek fostered children before me, and they’d had a foster daughter living with them when I moved in. They've got their own children and grandchildren my age, so we got on well.”
After a difficult journey with her own mental health, Megan faced stigma around her own BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) diagnoses. Meg has opened up with others about her condition in the hope more people become educated about different mental health conditions.
“I think a lot of people thought I was naughty or just weird before. But my foster carers saw there was more going on and encouraged me to go to the doctor and get tested. I don’t think I would be where I am now if they hadn’t given me that push.
It’s important foster carers know the different types of mental health conditions that exist.
“It’s important foster carers know the different types of mental health conditions that exist. Most people understand depression and anxiety but haven’t come across other conditions. I like to share my experiences where I can to help others suffering, and friends and families understand how they can support their loved ones.”
Young Minds offer trustworthy advice and training to caregivers and professionals supporting people with mental health conditions.
When Meg moved in with her foster carers, her world filled with new opportunities. Regularly dining out, big family Christmases and going on holiday were all firsts for Meg.
“It was never Sue and Derek going on holiday, it was always, ‘we're going on holiday.’ Suddenly I'm going to Spain with them, and I went to Taiwan with my school because Sue and Derrick helped me pay for it.
“They always wanted me to have opportunities, and now I'm an adult I feel like that's important as well. Derek and Sue lifted me up and showed me life is fun and that I deserve love."
It was never Sue and Derek going on holiday, it was always, ‘we're going on holiday.’
“My foster carers never gave up on me. They never expected me to just be okay and to get on with my life. Children aren’t in care because they want to be, they’re in care because something happened to them. Sue and Derek just accepted me as the person I was.
“If I could go back and see my younger self, I’d say, ‘I know you're worried, but you're actually going to have a great time. You're going to go on holidays, you're going to eat nice food. You're going to have somebody to always talk to. And joke with Derek at random times of the day. You're going to laugh.”
“Show young people that life is worth living so they can grow up into an adult who also thinks the same. You get to have someone come to you that's not experienced life before and you get to decide what to show them.
Show young people that life is worth living so they can grow up into an adult who also thinks the same.
"You get to share your love with another person who might not have felt love before. You get to be part of their lives forever. And then who knows? You might go to their graduation in the end.”
“I think it's not about experience, I feel like if you if you've got the heart and you're in it for the right reasons, then go for it.”
